06/05/2026
WHEN YOUR HUSBAND IS AN INTROVERT, BUT YOU’RE NOT
By Terri White
He was my brother-in-law’s best friend, but mostly we knew each other from church. I, a new convert; he, not-so-new. It was one of those wave your hands to praise the Lord churches. Some of us more than waved our hands. Some of us were more exuberant. Let me confess that I proved extra exuberant. Excessively exuberant? Over-the-top exuberant? Take your pick. But somehow, this quiet, introverted man was attracted to me, this wild woman.
Time passed, and we tied the knot. Forty-eight years ago. Throughout the decades, we have adjusted our lives with the seasonal changes. In this last chapter of our lives, life is more relaxed. I loved all the seasons, but this is my favorite. Now I know things I wish I had understood 40+ years ago. Nonetheless, we don’t know what we don’t know until we know it. Right? Then, too, it’s nice to admit that there’s much I don’t know. Like the universe and its mysteries. Or multiverse? The Black Hole? Quantim physics? The list is endless.
But back to Mrs. Exuberant & Mr. Introvert. In general, Steve does not like people. However, once he warms up to an individual, he’s all in – one person at a time - while ignoring the rest of humanity. I, on the other hand, loooove people without exception. With all my enthusiasm for life and people, I like to think I’ve added pizzazz to my husband’s life. But then, he’s probably kept me from flying to the moon. Balance, people, balance.
Recently, as I chatted with my friend Lance, he mentioned a certain couple from his church. A couple with a similar personality duo as my marriage: Helen, the introvert and John, the extrovert. (I’ve changed the names to protect the innocent. Ha!) After Bible study, Helen quietly slips out and never returns. Meanwhile, John leisurely chats with his buddies, mindless of the time. Noticing this, Lance siddled up to John, “I guess you and Helen come in separate cars?” John nods. The extrovert and the introvert found a solution to their dilemma. Smart.
That account, I mentioned to Lance, reminded me of my marriage. Back in the day, after the church service, I enjoyed chatting with my friends - oblivious of Steve or the time. Eventually, he would position himself close enough to get my attention, but not too conspicuously. When I glanced in his direction, he sliced his fore finger across his throat. His message? Time to go. Sigh. . .
Not to be outdone, once in the Wal-Mart parking lot, I bounced out of the car to chat with my friend Joyce. It seemed only a couple of minutes, but, alas, not likely. Deciding we were far too loquacious, Steve charged over, whisked me up, and dumped me in the car. All the while Joyce and I laughed, waving goodbye. Conversation to be continued.
Lance chuckled. He thinks my life is hilarious.
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