13/04/2024
HEY PARENTS!
Check this tips from American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.
Having a child brings an endless list of tasks: bathing, helping with dressing, feeding, teaching, and comforting. At the end of the day, all these demands can be tiring, but they can also be very rewarding when we think that they won't stay small forever.
However, at the same time, the role of parents is to prepare the child for an independent and self-sufficient life. If you intervene at the first difficulty the child encounters in doing something, you will inevitably create the idea that the child is helpless and incapable.
Offer opportunities for your children to feel the same way and learn that they are as capable as older children. Allow the child to choose their own clothes, prepare or help prepare snacks, and even encourage them to approach store staff to ask a question or seek help finding a toy.
If there are younger children in the household – such as a younger sibling – it's a good idea to encourage the older one to be a "helper" to the adults, which would involve taking care of or playing with the younger ones while the parents are dealing with other tasks.
Depending on the location, some children may be capable of walking alone to a friend's house or grandparents' house, for example. If the child doesn't know the answer to something – like the definition of a word – suggest that they look it up themselves.
Giving children opportunities to establish mastery over something and engage in tasks encourages them to believe they are capable and useful. Doing this gradually can teach young children to take care of themselves without feeling "abandoned". It's ideal to incorporate some of these practices into a child's daily routine, which may change over time to match their stage of development. It's worth noting that, although it may seem strange, the recommendation is for this stimulation to start as early as possible so that children can establish self-confidence from the beginning.
Include children in household chores. According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, some suggestions for each age group are:
2 to 3 years: they can put away toys, groceries, and dress with help;
4 to 5 years: they can help feed pets, make their beds (perhaps not perfectly), and help clear the table after dinner;
6 to 7 years: they can clear tables and put away their clothes;
7 to 9 years: they can load and unload the dishwasher, help prepare meals, and pack their own school lunch;
10 to 11 years: they can change bed sheets, help clean the kitchen or bathroom;
12 years or older: they can wash the car, help with younger siblings, and with grocery shopping.
Remember that these are skills and may require a learning process. It may seem faster to do the tasks yourself, but helping the child learn them will be useful in the long run. Research suggests that there are benefits to including tasks in a child's routine from age three. Those who participate and have the opportunity to help may have higher self-esteem, be more responsible, and be better equipped to deal with life's frustrations and adversities.
