Porkys Discounts

Porkys Discounts we sell a whole range of different products that you never knew you needed till now

Welcome to Porkys Discounts,in my store I sell mainly dvd's but I also get my hands on information e-books, music cd's,fantasy,gothic and other giftware,clothing and football and fishing goods,so it is always worth checking back now and again as you never know whats here, thanks for visiting:

31/12/2024

hi all, hope you are all well, I hope you had a peaceful Christmas and can you believe we have reached the end of another year,

As I seem to say each year where did that go, the older you get, the quicker it seems to go,
By the way if you are going out tonight a quick warning to all you drivers .
Be careful about drink driving as we are getting closer to the new year, the police are out there checking on people.
Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing led to another and I had a few too many cocktails and then went onto the wine. Not a good idea.
Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my car at the pub and took a bus home. Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalyser tests.
Because I was in a bus they just waved it past. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I’ve never driven a bus before and I am not even sure where I got it from

It's been a funny year though, as here at Porkys we keep ticking over, but sales have took a big slowdown since i got chucked off eBay, it really makes things harder as there are other sites but not many that you can sell anything and everything on, the few that are out there just don't have the traffic passing through, but we soldier on I have rehashed the website and will start promoting that in the New Year and will have loads of different items on there, will also use Facebook more, Amazon and Vinted so there is plenty to be excited about,
mind who knows what the new year will hold, After we bit our noses off to spite our faces earlier this year and let Labour in, already the word recession has been bandied about for next year, world peace is on a knife edge, and of course Nellies Mate is returning to power over in the USA, so who knows what will happen after the things our lot have said about him, plus of course my team Manchester United look like being in a relegation scrap if it gets much worse, oh well I guess we will see what happens, I would like to wish you all a very Happy, Healthy and hopefully Prosperous 2025 and remember people if you don't make any changes it won't be a new year, it will just be the same year repeated

before i go
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amal. The other goes to a family in Spain. They name him Juan. Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband she wishes she also had a picture of Amal. He responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

Keep smiling

Range of hot water bottles, brand new 2 litre £5 each
16/12/2024

Range of hot water bottles, brand new 2 litre £5 each

hi all, hope you are all good, how about this two posts in just over a week, well it is coming very fast yes the C word ...
04/11/2024

hi all, hope you are all good, how about this two posts in just over a week, well it is coming very fast yes the C word 😁, I remember last year I got wrong again with the missus

We went shopping together just before Christmas. The wife quickly noticed that I was missing and because we had a lot to do she called me on my mobile.
After I picked up the phone the wife said " Where are you, you know we have lots to do!"
I said "You remember the jewellers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?"
Little tears started to flow down her cheeks and she got all choked up and said "Yes, I do remember that shop!!!"
"Well I am in the bookies next door to that.

just to say there is some Christmas stuff coming on the website sample pics below, please feel free to visit and see what delights we have on there and please come back as there is items being added all the while visit https://porkysdiscounts.co.uk/

Finally
A young guy in our village called Tommy bought a horse from a farmer for £250 and the farmer agreed to deliver the horse to Tommy the following day.
The next day though, the farmer turned up at Tommy’s house and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.”

Tommy replied, “Well, then just give me my money back. That’s fine.”
The farmer said, “Sorry, I can’t do that. I have spent it already.”

Tommy then said, “Okay, then, just bring me the dead horse.”
The farmer was surprised and asked Tommy, “Why? What ya gonna do with him?”
Tommy replied, “I’m going to raffle him off.”
The farmer laughed and said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse! Who’d buy a ticket?”

Tommy answered, “Sure I can, just watch me. I just won’t tell anybody the horse is dead.”
A month later, the farmer met up with Tommy again and asked, “What happened with that dead horse in the end. Did you raffle him off?”
Tommy said, “I sure did. I sold 5000 tickets at £5 a piece.”

The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?”
Tommy smiled and said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his £5 back.”
Keep Smiling

Hi all, hope you are well, as usual with me, it's been a while since my last post, I really must try harder, it's just f...
27/10/2024

Hi all, hope you are well, as usual with me, it's been a while since my last post, I really must try harder, it's just finding the time to sit down and write a post,
Well winter is coming and the clocks have gone back, OH I remember last winter I was at work on a icy morning when I got a message from the missus, Windows Frozen, won't Open, so I texted back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and then gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 10 minutes later: "Thanks, Computer is really Buggered now."
Any way I just popped on to say that as the cold weather is coming we have a load of brand new ram online 2 litre hot water bottles with covers 6 different designs, These were manufactured in mid 2023, they are £6 each, if you are local to wymondham give me a shout if not check out the website (click the link) as they will be on there

thanks for reading and finally

This morning at about 7:45, I was passing our local grocery store that opens at 8:00 for senior citizens only.
A young man came from the parking lot and tried to cut in at the front of the line, but an old lady beat him back into the parking lot with her cane.

He returned and tried to cut in again but an old man punched him in the gut, then kicked him to the ground and rolled him away.

As he approached the line for the third time he said, "Look, if you don't let me unlock the damn door you're never going to get in there!”

keep smiling

Walking  through the charity shop after work, the porky snout started twitching, trotters were itching then I saw these ...
10/05/2024

Walking through the charity shop after work, the porky snout started twitching, trotters were itching then I saw these 3 x A Santos Portugal Hand Painted Salad Bowls, haven't checked yet but Porky senses said they are worth more than the £3 each I paid even without the pottery trays underneath

Deal of the day in morrisons, don't come here though they all mine
13/04/2024

Deal of the day in morrisons, don't come here though they all mine

hi all, i hope you are well and you all had a great Christmas (or holiday if you don't celebrate), ours was good but qui...
31/12/2023

hi all, i hope you are well and you all had a great Christmas (or holiday if you don't celebrate), ours was good but quiet, like everything though I can't believe how quick it has gone by, and so we get to the end of the year when we look back at how 2023 went,

for me personally Porkys Discounts had been on a downward slope since i got banned from ebay full story ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BfnxH_CR4Q&t=247s) if you don't know it, but thankfully things have started to look a bit better towards the end of the year just like a fisherman I had to cast the net wider and hope, (talking of fishing Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait. The first priest got up and walked across the water to get some more bait. After two hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait, so he got up and walked across the water. After three hours of fishing, they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So, he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom.
The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, “Should we have told him where the rocks were)
back to the post the thing is people are hard up for money nowadays and have to be more careful about what they buy not so many random buys now, but hopefully with trying a couple of other things it will get me back again, looking forward to trying anyway,

Elsewhere in 2023 the politicians done their best to prove what lots of us think that they are all cheats, crooks and vagabonds and in it for themselves, roland rat (sunak) has been struggling to hang on to his job for what seems like most of the year, so he tries to deflect the real problems with his favourite saying "stop the boats" they want us to concentrate on that so people don't look at how they are screwing the N.H.S. and the cheating and thievery that went on with all the covid deals where a lot of them and their relatives made a lot of money while we were all locked away,
Also the return of the strike appeared in 2023 with the Teachers, railway workers, junior doctors, nurses and even passport office workers striking for what they think they should have some with success and some which will carry on next year,

We crowned a new King and wife (sorry cant call her by the official name) and 2 days of celebration was granted which is always good, Harry was still accidently causing hassle in the family with his new book, his and her candle may flicker out in the next year even the Americans are getting fed up of them

As always the music world lost it's usual array of stars including Tina Turner, Shane MacGowan, George ‘Funky’ Brown (kool and the Gang), Sinéad O’Connor, Tony Bennett, David Crosby, Jeff Beck and many more, entertainers as well Paul O'Grady, Barry Humphries, sir Michael Gambon, Glenda Jackson and Parkie to name a few,

Well enough of my rambling I just wanted to come on and look forward to 2024 which I think will be a year of change for a lot of people, I don't know about you but I don't do resolutions I just have a list that i hope to do more of, the list is
"More sleep. More music. More money. More books. More sunsets. More creating. More long walks. More laughter. More hugs. More dreaming. More road trips. More fun. More love." hopefully that is achievable,
So from Porkys Discounts may I wish you all a Very HAPPY, HEALTHY and PROSPEROUS 2024

A man boards a bus with six kids. When they are all settled in their seats he gets his newspaper out and starts to read, an old lady across leans towards the man and coughs, the man ignores her, so she pulls on his sleeve and asks, ‘‘are they all your kids?’’ The man replied sharply, ‘‘No I work for a condom production company and these here are customer complaints.

keep smiling

25/12/2023

Hi all, well it is that time of year again, I just want to wish each and everyone of you a fantastic Christmas if you celebrate it, and if you don't have a good day, as I always say, treat every Christmas as if it is your last and one year you will be right, and I would like to thank you for keeping Porkys Discounts alive and kicking MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL

A farmer’s boy woke up and went to the kitchen to get breakfast. The mother told him that he would get it after his chores were done. He stomps out angrily and heads out to clean the chickens. While going about it, a chicken pecks him and he kicks it.
He goes to the pigsty and when one pig knocks him, he knocks it back hard
He then went ahead to milk the cow and while close to finishing, the cow kicked the bucket and spilled the milk, so he kicked the cow too. The mother saw everything and told him no eggs because he kicked the chicken. No bacon because he kicked the pig and no milk because he kicked the cow as well.
While in the house, he saw his dad come down the stairs and when a p***y cat almost tripped him, he kicked it. The boy looked at the mother and said, ‘‘do you want to tell him or should I ?’

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hi all, I hope you are well, well that's me done in my full time job till the new year, it's not always good to have lot...
16/12/2023

hi all, I hope you are well, well that's me done in my full time job till the new year, it's not always good to have lots of holiday left at end of year instead of using them when the sun shines, but when you get here and leave off early for Christmas it is like "YEAH", well I hope you are all getting your shopping done and getting organised for the big day (I am nowhere near yet as usual),
but I thought I would stick a few more pics of what we have available including the wooden table hockey game (makes you very competitive) :), cheers guys

A Norfolk solicitor representing a very wealthy art collector called his client and said to him, “Paul, I have some good news and I have some bad news.”
The art collector replied, “I’ve had an awful day; let’s hear the good news first.”
The Solicitor said, “Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she invested £5,000 in two pictures that she thinks will bring a minimum of £15-20 million. I think she could be right.”
Paul replied enthusiastically, “Well done! My wife is a brilliant businesswoman! You’ve just made my day. Now I know I can handle the bad news. What is it?”
The solicitor replied, “The pictures are of you with your secretary.”

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Hi all,       Well it's coming up to that time of year again, very quickly as well, I hope you are all keeping well and ...
10/12/2023

Hi all,
Well it's coming up to that time of year again, very quickly as well, I hope you are all keeping well and you are getting prepared, just thought I would come on and show you some of the products we have available for the season,

The sky was looking ominous so I asked Alexa, “Surely, it’s not going to rain today?”And she replied, “Yes it is, and don’t call me Shirley.”That was when I realized I’d left my phone on Airplane mode.

keep smiling

Just love how dainty these portmeirion forks  and cake slice are
21/11/2023

Just love how dainty these portmeirion forks and cake slice are

25/07/2023

Hi guys, hope you are well, sorry not been on but just never seem to get time to sit down and write one of my usual posts, anyway in an attempt to bring the sunshine back I just popped in to say porkys summer sale is on, 20 % off everything and lots to come cheers

A shy guy goes into a pub and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively, “Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?”

She responds by yelling, at the top of her voice, “NO! I will not sleep with you!”

Everyone at the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is extremely embarrassed and slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologises. She smiles and says quietly, “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I’m a psychology student and I’m studying how people respond to embarrassing situations.”

To this, the man responds at the top of his voice, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN £800?”

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Address

82 Hackford Road, Wicklewood, Wymondham
Wymondham
NR189HT

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