04/11/2021
18 weeks ago, I started this training season on the Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception. The “Divine D***y” 4-day challenge was to end today on Divine Mercy Sunday with my 5th marathon. Running to Jesus through Mary would be a running consecration.
After getting injured in late January, I found myself in a dark place. Depression is too strong a word, so I’ve called it a prolonged funk. I always thought I’d be one of those people that would bounce back stronger, but my body rebelled and I re-aggravated the injury. So I let my body heal. And when my body did come back, my spirit for the challenge had left. I’ve spent the last two months averaging one run each week with nothing in the double digits until just last week. Only recently have I started to feel any light in the darkness.
Running the Divine D***y weekend has been an exercise in trust. Even without running back-to-back days in months, I knew I could at least run Thursday’s 5K and Friday’s 10K. On Saturday’s half marathon, the wall started to creep in. (I started off too fast and unknowingly set PRs for a 5K and 10K in the first part of the run. Oops.)
Enter today. A true D***y Challenge has you running a full marathon on Sunday. I woke up not knowing what I would run; I just knew that I would be out for 2-5 hours. Yes, this challenge weekend is about trust, and running 4 days in a row after missing so much training is quite reckless. That reckless trust is where I struggle. It’s where I struggle most in my faith. The plan was to empty the tank and take whatever mileage He would give on the trail.
During the run, the number 16 came to mind. It was the longest distance I had completed before injury. But after finishing 16, He said 20. At 18 miles, I ran out of calories and water (and may have been a little delirious). So 20 is where we left it. I left everything on the trail, even leaving behind a final 10K that would’ve brought me to complete that Sunday full marathon.
Yes, my ego is fighting the urge to dwell on that distance that was left behind, that I was just 6.2 miles away from finishing a true D***y. A larger part of me just wants to give thanks that He somehow got this many miles out of reckless trust. It feels like I just came back last Sunday, and in a way, that actually is the case.
This entire weekend I ran with my classic shirts, reminding me that the dream of this “Honor After Sunday” faith/fitness apparel company is still on my heart. Christine and I have talked a lot recently about what it’d mean to finally step forward unafraid and just trust. She believes that we can. I’m catching up to that idea.
625.74 miles to go.