01/20/2026
Today felt heavy.
On the drive to San Antonio for my four-week follow-up with my neurosurgeon, “Look Up Child” by Lauren Daigle came on, and it felt like the soundtrack to my heart. I was weary. Defeated. Honest with God in a way only exhaustion brings.
Lord… I’ve been through so much.
Years of debilitating migraines, countless medications, procedures, and surgeries. I’m literally walking around with a plate, six screws, and four wires running through my body to my head to help block pain signals. Some days it’s hard not to feel like a robot instead of a person.
Today I questioned everything.
Why am I even here?
Why does this have to be so hard?
I’m tired of canceling plans.
Tired of not being the person I want to be.
Tired of waking up in excruciating pain every single day.
So there I was—crying in my car, starving, emotionally spent, sitting in San Antonio. I stopped at a random pizza place, wiped my tears, tried to pull myself together just enough to order my food.
And then… God.
As I turned the corner to sit down, I literally bumped into Pastor Ed from CBC. I looked him dead in the eyes and said, “Shut the front door. No way are you here right now!”
His sweet wife, Stephanie, instantly knew—it was a God appointment.
Pastor Ed gave me the biggest hug and asked how he could pray for me. And in that moment, I knew: this wasn’t coincidence. It was confirmation.
God was reminding me—
I am still worthy.
I am still needed.
And I am still called to keep fighting, even when I’m tired, even when I’m hurting, even when I feel weak.
So today, I’m choosing to look up, even when my heart feels low.
Because sometimes God meets us not in the miracle yet—but in the middle of the mess, right when we’re about to give up.
And today… He met me in a pizza place. 🤍
